Tidying up and KonMari

[alotofyarn]

Sounds like progress! I would suggest you should make life easier on you, and donate as much as you can in one fell swoop, regardless of how much you make back. Time is money, and space is money, and it's usually a better return on investment to free up your time and space than to invest your time and store your stuff interminably while trying to make a few more bucks on it!

I'm pretty sure I've decided that's my plan - but there are some nice MudPie and other outfits that my mom bought that I'd really prefer to not just get rid of. I think I put them all at the top of the various boxes when I went through them last time, so I just need to open each up and pull it out quickly to take that stuff out.

[rufflesanddots]

I'm thinking I'll take a personal day in a few weeks to go through all my clothes. Not sure I can do it with DH around. Too many distractions.

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[alotofyarn]

Once we get the tree up, I can wrap the presents and put those out too, which will clear out more from the room.

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[spotty_dog]

I'm thinking I'll take a personal day in a few weeks to go through all my clothes. Not sure I can do it with DH around. Too many distractions.

Do you not have time at home without him? No call? I forget what stage of training y'all are in! I definitely saved my major KM work for times when he'd be out of the house for a few hours...

Once we get the tree up, I can wrap the presents and put those out too, which will clear out more from the room.

Just having space within which to think and breathe and arrange, can be a real relief.

[rufflesanddots]

We are MS2. He starts Step study at the end of December, so he'll be home 24/7. Hoping to sneak in a day or two by myself before dealing with that. He starts rotations February 29, though, so I'll have plenty of alone time then!

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[MsSassyBaskets]

Well, I finally got the book, have read about 1/3 so far, and am hoping to do a KonMari blitz next week. I have the entire week off, but DD can go to daycare anytime M-Th and I plan to take advantage of that. First order of business - long, long nap.

Next up is my clothing. Our bedroom is a constant war zone with laundry. There are always piles of clean but unfolded laundry, and piles of worn-once-but-not-really-dirty stuff all over my closet. It's one of our biggest organizing problems. I did a quick look through my closet and already purged some stuff I just don't use/need anymore, but next week I'm going to have to tackle them start to finish using KonMari principles.

The hardest thing for me right now is that I don't really love most of my clothes. I've mostly been wearing casual jeans and t-shirts for the last few years, and they're full of cat-claw holes and worn out from repeat washing due to baby gunk. My office-wear is mostly cheap stuff I've gotten on sale in a panic when I had to dress for a meeting. If I get rid of everything that doesn't spark joy, I'll have about 3 pairs of jeans, a few of the newest t-shirts and sweaters and casual button ups, and about 2-3 work-appropriate outfits. I would probably throw out 3/4 of my wardrobe because nothing "sparks joy" anymore. I might be able to revive the "joy" of some of it with a good stain removal, wash, and iron, but I'm already stressing because I would need to rebuild a decent work wardrobe - I want to start going into the office 3-4 days a week next year. I've been avoiding the office and working from home because of pumping, but I'll be completely finished with that and I really need to start acting like a professional adult. And office-wear does not spark joy in me.

On the other hand, maybe I'll find that the 3 remaining outfits make me feel good and make it easier for me to dress for the office. Maybe getting rid of the clothes I don't like, however functional, will make me feel better about dressing for work. I don't know. Or I'll feel like I have no clothes and I'll go stress shopping and get more functional shit I don't really like that much. It's stressing me out and I haven't even started yet.

I used to feel a bit better about my work-wear - when I wore heels every day and nice wool pencil skirts and silk blouses and fine-knit cardigans and basically dressed like a J. Crew catalog. I don't know how to blend that "feel" with the functional flats and easy-clean clothes I need with a baby. When I dress for work now, I look in the mirror and see a mom who doesn't give a fuck. Sigh. Ok, so clearly this is releasing a lot of feelings for me, which I guess means it's doing its job.

I'm also feeling daunted by the other random stuff around the house. Clothes, shoes bedding, towels, books - easy. Papers - ugh, but OK. Even kitchen tools and accessories - easy. But the random shit sitting around in the office, hall closet, and basement are going to be the hardest to categorize and figure out. Office supplies, electronic accessories, computer accessories, random doo-dads and shit my mom has given me... Guess I'll worry about it when I get there.

Anyway, I plan to make very good use of my 3-4 days to myself next week. I really love the sentiment of KonMari - the idea of only surrounding yourself with things you love and that help you live the life you want is very appealing. That's why the book is such a hit, it encourages you to aspire to your ideal lifestyle. However, I'm not convinced that it takes all the complexity of life into consideration. I have a lot of obligations that don't spark joy, and I can't just get rid of all the accouterments of those obligations. But, progress is progress, and I'll take it.

[SoonerTexan]

The thing that has helped most with papers:



That beauty right there. It normally is in a more functional not covered in nutcrackers

I got it at Nebraska Furniture Mart and it took me 3 months to find an evening to actually go through all the papers and set it up with folders, but now we are golden. I keep a fireproof safe of not easily replaceable stuff like birth certificates and such in my closet, but everything else important goes here. Each child has a folder for growth charts, vac records, etc, DH has a folder for med shit, I have folders for warrantys, medical bills, stuff to save for taxes, etc. all that used to sit in a shelf forever and now I just go through mail and file, toss, or shred it immediately


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[SoonerTexan]

I feel you on the clothes though. I think my new SAHM "Spark joy" wardrobe will consist of Old Navy high rise compression workout pants! I got rid of a ton recently. I never wore it or it didn't fit


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[gcuthbe1]

Thanks for posting in this again! My sister moved out and purged, so I'm consolidating our stuff to donate (round 2 in the past week). Kitty is helping!


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[gcuthbe1]

will consist of Old Navy high rise compression workout pants!

Yessssss OMG I got a pair like a year ago semi by accident and am OBSESSED!

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[spotty_dog]

MSB, keep reading. A lot of the "big picture" stuff is covered in the last third of the book.

In my opinion, there are two kinds of joy that can be sparked. First is that feeling when you pick the thing up and it makes you smile or say, "Oh, I LOVE this!" (Whether it's a ratty tee or an evening gown that makes you feel like a princess!) But second, and sometimes more challenging, is the feeling of realizing that this thing has a role to play in your life. You need to be clothed, and this thing clothes you adequately and regularly (a convenient layering tee or a simple pair of socks.) You need to eat, and this fork gets the food from your plate to your mouth on the daily. And so on. She talks about this alternate perspective of "joy" a little bit more in her Reddit AMA and Google talk than in the book, I think. Also, it's been mentioned that "sparks joy" is just a translation. Another way to say the phrase she actually uses in Japanese is something like "throbs". It's like a resonance or a recognition, not a "WHEE ECSTASY!"

I started out by thinking I had very few clothes, that I didn't care about clothes, and that most of what I had I actively disliked. And indeed, when I was done, I had about 5 t-shirts, 3 pairs of pants, 3 cardigans, etc. Seriously bare-bones. BUT. It was pretty much the same stuff I was wearing all the time anyway -- the things I discarded were just the things I wouldn't wear until I hit the bottom of the barrel. Well, now I don't have a choice but to do laundry before I hit that point. Also, what remained showed hints of style. I had a consistent palette, and a consistent pattern of choosing solid tops, jeans or hiking pants, and a fleece or cardigan. So, slowly, as sales came up, I picked up a few more pieces that fit that pattern. And now I have three little drawers of clothes and always find it easy to choose what to wear. I'm probably going to let go of a couple more things -- a stained t-shirt and a weird synthetic long-sleeve -- now that I have enough clothes to wear that I don't need to dig down to them any more.

So, chances are, if you trust the process, but also use your common sense and don't just build momentum until you've thrown out everything and have to go to work in pajamas, you will start building that sense in yourself of how to decide what's worth keeping in your life. And that new skill will translate to figuring out what's worth adding back to your life the next time you go shopping. It all works out! Like magic.

[MsSassyBaskets]

I need to find time to finish reading before Saturday! Gah.

[alotofyarn]

Oh look, it almost looks like a baby room!




We won't discuss the state of the rest of the house... So. Many. Boxes.

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[spotty_dog]

The bedding is really cute.

[alotofyarn]

The bedding is really cute.

Thanks! I'm still missing the sheet for the crib (teal) and the curtains (the zoo fabric). And the bumper will come out of the crib until he's able to roll over on his own - E loves hers still and uses it like a pillow across the back, plus it kept her from getting limbs stuck when she was younger, so I went ahead and got one for baby C too.

I need to get a new comforter for the bed too and make a headboard. And probably wash those pillows, because they're a little gross looking. I can move the dresser over a bit too once I get rid of those diaper boxes, which are still all of E's clothes that I haven't gotten rid of, because I think my parents are going to hang onto them in case my brother's wife gets pregnant again and has a girl.